TO BE A PREDATOR OR TO BE A PREY?

 

Earl Nightingale got me quite interested in his audio cassettes. In his cassette self-esteem and courage, he narrates this short story:

There’s a story about a man hunting tigers in India, who was suddenly surprised by a huge Bengal tiger—it was almost on top of him. The man raised his rifle and fired, but he overshot and missed. The tiger, frightened by the man and thrown off stride by the noise of the gun, leaped toward the hunter. But the leap was too wide, and he missed his prey…

The story does not end here but we’ll get to it very soon.

He got me thinking about the ways we approach life circumstances and the consequent results. I remember back in the days in my adolescent life in Africa, precisely in Ivory Coast. I was living with my uncle in a small building of 3 floors. My auntie was into any kind of small business in order to improve the family incomes. So, in that house we were selling all sort of juices, cakes, ice and more. We were living at the second floor. Right above us was a family of three people, father, mother and daughter Joelle. A very beautiful young girl for whom we all had a crush, me included. I was lucky enough to be the one she had eyes for.  Years ago, in my country and maybe even now in some areas, the young boys do the cleaning of the house. The mopping of the floor was done on our knees using a old towel. So, for this task we don’t put our best short on, and not even a nice short. One day as I was doing my house chore, singing and free in my head, someone knocked on the door. I was so much into my head that I went straight to open the door not even asking wo was there. There I found myself face to face with the young lady for whom I used to cut my hair every month, for whom I used I put on my best short to stay on the balcony so I could say hi when she passes by. Now, there I was standing almost naked, in my old pant and all wet. It took me few seconds to come back and I soon as I regained my senses, I ran away as fast as I can. As I was running, I even fell hard on the wet floor. But I got up like a cat and run straight to my room. Mohammed Ali said once “ I’m too fast, so fast that I switch off the light and hit the bed before the light gets off” Well on that day I was faster than him. What’s the point of that story? Now as I think back on that day I ran because I was the prey. I used to be the predator, finding the right spot to spot my prey.

When a gazelle sees a lion, it runs. When a mouse sees a cat, it does the same. In nature the prey almost never chases the predator and do not even have what it takes to face it.


  In our daily lives we have the same challenges and be a predator or a prey becomes the main question. 

A young boy having a crush on a girl if he has prey mentality, he will never approach the girl and if by chance he does he won’t even be able to say the right words. Although he might have practiced for a long and multiple time for this moment. His opportunity becomes his misfortune. But if he has a predator mentality, everything changes. He is the one the girl wants; she is the one who has to be attractive: Every word he says are coming from the conviction that he is the one. So, the voice tone, the body posture, the fluidity of the mind follows his conviction. Even his walks look like that of a lion, calm and serene.

Do you remember going to your first work interview? So, you’ll remember having almost not slept the night before. You have tried many different cloths, although everyone in the family has given his approval for one suit you were still doubtful the morning in front of the mirror. What about the moment you saw the HR coming towards you? Your heart dropped and your mind went blink. Even when you have managed to pass all that, they asked you the killing question: “what is your expecting salary? There although you know the grid, doubts and fears come in as if they were just waiting for the moment. In such situation the prey mentality takes over easily. But let rewind it a bit. Do we really have to be the prey? Yes, we are looking for a job, but what about the company? They are not doing you any favor. Matter of fact they need a young man like you. They are searching for someone who has been preparing for almost three decades in order to be competent enough to bring value. They need you; they have to have you. After all, three decades of studying and learning has provided you with what it takes. So, next time going for an interview, what will you choose to be? A prey or a predator?

Do you also remember your appointment at the bank for the loan of your first apartment? Your wife and you have trained for body postures, vocabularies. You have heard that this particular bank is very difficult, four peoples out of 10 in your area have failed to obtain the loan. So, you have been thing about the 4 who have failed and forgot those six who have succeeded. Although, you have a stable job, the support form parents and maybe grandparents your heart did not have peace at all. I never really searched for the definition of bank but writing this article I got curious. The definition goes like this: “ A bank is a financial institution licensed to receive deposits and make loans..” So, you will agree with me that you are the reason of their existence and the need you even more for their survival.

I guess with theses examples you understand my point. Having a prey or a predator mentality impact our daily life. With a prey mentality we fear what might go wrong so we anticipate and suffer the pain from a hypothetical wrong future. While with a predator mentality we see and focus only what we want motivated and convinced that it has to be it.  Unfortunately, three decades of schooling do not instruct our minds on which of those two horses we should ride so we learn from family and friends if we are lucky otherwise, we read books or blog like mine.

Choosing the right mentality is not an overnight solution but is good to know that we could an must choose.

So, if with the right mindset, the girl refuses you. It is alright, nothing certified that she was destined to be your wife and luckily for you so many are still out there and if you look closer there is already one next door waiting only on you to smile back to her.

What if the bank refuses you the credit? The four people who did not get the credit are still living. They might have gotten a loan from another bank. If you are frustrated so much about it you could do like Adam Deering. The Royal Bank of Scotland in Urmston, Greater Manchester refused him a loan for his dream. Because they didn't have faith enough in a 21 old year young man with a vision. He bet on his self and years later he bought the building of the bank.

Failures, deceptions, refusal injuries might come but it remains always the essential part of this equation called life. You, yes you, what you do can wipe away and build because you and only you is the essential, the key.

 

Going back to the opening story, the end goes like this:

..The man returned to camp and spent several hours perfecting his aim for short distances and quick firing. On the following day, he again stalked the tiger. Finally, he spotted the beast at some distance. The tiger was practicing short leaps.

Well, we can and must choose the right mentality but we owe not to count the other person out because he has been training as well.

 

 

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